Dining Establishment? I Think NOT!

I want to understand. I couldn't even get through that sentence without feeling bad about myself. I lied. I don't want to understand at all because it's just plain stupid.

Ok honestly, how many of you out there go to Costco....to EAT?! Come on, fess up! I'm not talking about the occasional hot dog or slice of pie at the food court thingy. However, I don't really get that whole thing either. Do you pull up a chair and gnaw on a rib at Safeway? Nooooo! Well, then why is this any different?! (I think my guy has secretly gone to Costco on his own to suck down a dog or two because he knows how I feel about it). Anyway, I digress. That's not the issue here.

Hey, people walking around with your heads up your asses, holding your stupid little, white paper cups. Do you see me?? I'm standing RIGHT behind you with my big ass cart! Hellooooo?! Oh, and all of your family members that you brought along for the event? They're in my way, too.

Please move outta my way while you're standing there, trying to decide if you like that sample of hickory smoked lil' weenies enough to throw in your cart. There's still a little bit of room amongst the cereal, ketchup, dog food, tub o' butter, lawn chairs, and package of tighty whities. Seriously, do you think you're at a street fair? Dude, you're in a fuckin' warehouse! I can just see some trashy ass guy saying, "hey baby, let me take you out for a nice buffet dinner tonight." Costco is NOT a dining establishment. You're confused. And cheap as hell.

And the sample giver-outers? Please stop yelling at me! No, I don't want to try your damn food. I WANT to make my way to the front of this goddamn store so I can buy my loaf of bread, my ridiculous amount of red meat, and my alcohol. The alcohol was a last minute add on, right after I passed the family sampling the "shrimp scampi in a cup."

Idiots of the world, unite!




CASE IN POINT



 

 

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